Ashmodeus.com - The way it was meant to be!

Click here to pornolize your life!

I was just checking my referrer log and I found out that someone had gone to my site after typing the term My Favourite Robot + ‘I fucked satan up the ass’ into Google!

It must be a quote from a series… At least I hope it’s a quote from a series! After a quick google i couldn’t find anything on it.

Either way it’s good to know my site is reaching its intended audience!

Check it out for yourself by clicking here!

What the hell is that thing on the right? It’s a news feed thats what!

Yes after about 6 months of talking about it I finally put the bugger in. Yahoo.

Currently it is ugly and only gives you the feed from gizmodo (what else could you need?) but I plan to chang…. ah who am I kidding?

Enjoy.

GyroBall is now working, check it out!

Also, If you think GyroBall is pants check out the original and the best….. Space Invaderzzz!!

I am torn between the conflicting urges to develop new content for this site and to drink lots of beer while sitting on the couch in my underpants. As a compromise I have decided to just put some links up here that I have blatantly stolen from Ben’s site [ www.bakedbens.co.uk ]. Go check it out, it doesn’t suck! (Well not much anyway)

Enjoy these links… It was hard work cutting and pasting them!

» Parallel Park Game

» A man playing a piano with his balls

ALSO: The game on the right is a bit fux0red temporarily as my current ISP (The Salmon Farm) is a bit, how shall we say, bandwidth challenged at the moment

The enterprise song

Hello, I’m not dead! Just busy!

Only had time to change the colours up a bit today. I think they look better, don’t you?? (Comments are still a bit broken so don’t bother answering!

Well you can’t blame him for trying to make light of a bad situation… but this is disturbing nonetheless…!

The Trach Cannon and other great things to do with a hole in your neck!

Hehe, some facts about ninjas you may have not known:

1. Ninjas are mammals.

2. Ninjas fight ALL the time.

3. The purpose of the ninja is to flip out and kill people.

Find out more at REAL ULTIMATE POWER!!

I would definitely recommend that anyone who likes to laugh and is in London at the moment goes to see this!

I mean, where else could you find and opera with lyrics like ‘what that fuck? what that fuck? what the fucky fucky fuck?!‘ being sung by a wife who just found out her husband wants to be her ‘baby’ and ‘he’s a cunt (referring to Satan), he’s a cunty cunty cunty cunty cunty cunty cunty cunt-cunt-cunt-cunt-cunt cunty cunt!‘ being sung by a choir of angels? Intersperse this with numerous references to ‘dirty hoes’ being addicted to crack and the threat of Jerry himself getting ‘FUCKED UP THE ASS WITH BARBER WIRE!’ and you have a show that can’t fail to entertain! (unless you are a c*… never mind

My favourite bits were the tap dancing Ku Klux Klan members (this was seriously funny) and the showdown between Jesus and Satan where they both sang ‘fuck you’ and ‘talk to the hand’ for about 15 minutes at each other. Oh how we laughed until we stopped!… Ok you had to be there but it is a seriously funny show. The old American couple sitting next to me thought it was so funny that they had to leave in the intermission, so that just proves it!

The show is currently starring David Soul, of Starsky and Hutch fame, as Jerry at the moment which is cool cos he’s Good™. It also has one of the guys (playing a girl again, as usual) from the Broadway production of Taboo (which Roxy and I saw over there) which is also Good™ because he has an amazing voice (although he doesn’t get to use it quite as much in this show).

Man, even the program for the show is funny!

Go see it! Or don’t! I don’t give a shit, I saw it last night!

Ashmodeus.com - Now with Working Mode™!

What the hell am I gonna write about now?

Goddammit, I was hoping that the site would fix itself if I just stared at the HTML long enough but it seems to still be broken…

I know it’s because of some shitty little I.E. issue that is gonna take 5 seconds to fix once I find but I can’t seem to find the problem!!

Aaaaaaiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! I need a computer at home so I can take this mofo apart and spend an evening sorting out this left nutsack of a problem (along with all the other little shitty bits on the site that really annoy me. Shutterbug anyone?). Work keeps eating into my lunchtimes… hehe there’s my priorities for ya.

Oh well, I don’t have long to wait really. Only about 5 more months to go until I arrive back in the land of the shrimp barbies and that glowing ball of gas in the sky… oh yeah, the Sun. I forgot what it was called for a second. Summer here so far has been like every other season in the UK. In fact I heard that there was a motion in Parliament to formally abolish summer and then just extend autumn a bit to cover it. Wouldn’t suprise me one bit!

Goddamn rain and mofo websites… It will be fixed by friday!! (failing that next year)

Ring, Ring, Ring, Ring, Ring, Ring, Ring, Banana Phone!

I forgot to post it on earlier but Rox and I have now officially been together for 2 years! Yahooo!

Good on us. This proves that people who are entirely different can somehow stick together for a long time without going mental (that often). Plus it makes the rent cheaper!

To many more years of hell fun and happiness, hehe

Ok, it’s been a bit quiet and boring and broken around here but over the next few days all that is going to (probably) change!

I got a new work machine last Friday and haven’t had that much time to sort it out so I currently have no web dev environment to speak of yet.

I’m hoping that by the end of lunchtime tomorrow things will be sorted so I can get on with fixing that really annoying problem that you Internet Explorer users are having….

Bear with me!

Ok the site is br0ken again in I.E.

I’m gonna try to fix it sometime soon but I don’t have time at the moment… Download FireFox! It works in that!

If you insist in sticking with Internet Explorer then scroll down!

hmm.. I really need to set up some more appropriate categories for my posts but this one is actually random crap.

Bloody Finger Mail
Send me one and let me know that you are stalking me! (ashmodeus@gmail.com)

Big momma kill droid giving birth to little baby kill droid
One step closer to world domination! Ahh isn’t that cute?

Something Awful’s homemade flamethrower
Photos of the gene pool self-cleaning mechanism in action…

Also Layton Hewitt lost to Federa!!! Our last aussie hope is gone!! Cracking game though!