Trans-Motherfucking-Formers Man 1
In quotes below is the draft post that I wrote when I saw the first Transformers trailers so long ago. I didn’t post it for some reason but I thought I should put it up here now before my mini-review 
Holy goddam shit in a bucket, I just saw THE NEW TRANSFORMERS MOVIE TRAILER!!!! AND IT IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE!!!
Man, I totally wasn’t interested at all in this movie until I saw this trailer. You don’t actually see much but what I did see reminds me of Terminator 2 except the bad dude is a Decepticon. DID YOU HEAR WHAT I JUST SAID??? T2 + DECEPTICONS MAN!!! DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW FUCKING COOL THIS IS??!!! IT’S TOTALLY FUCKING COOL! THAT’S HOW COOL IT IS!!!!!!
Shit, I am gonna have a giant robo boner for the entire film I can feel it already. I’m gonna have to order the extra large popcorn in order to hide it when I leave because watching this film is going to be the best thing that have ever occurred in the history of the planet Earth and very possibly our entire galaxy! Whooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Now it’s time for my mini-review…
BEST. MOVIE. EVER!
Please Note: If you talk to me about Michael Bay being less than the reincarnation of all major dieties or about plot holes or anything I will stone cold kill your ass, rip off your head and urinate on your corpse. Then I will pray to Michael our New Lord and bringer of enormous transforming Blackhawk helicopters, alien fighter jets and various GMC vehicles using your skull as some sort of candle holder.
It’s that simple buddy!
(The last sentence should be read in the voice of Master Shake from Aqua Teen Hunger Force )
Actually the only thing cooler than the fact that the Transformers movie exists, I have seen it and I can see it again anytime I want is that it was so successful and that a sequel is already being planned. You can stick your broom in your arse Harry Potter!
